Oi there, hello! It’s weekend time again! We had a lovely sunny week here, and Waits and I spent a lot of time outside, soaking up the last rays before they disappear for good. Right now there’s a storm moving in and it’s making me moody and broody and I guess that’s what winter’s all about, huh?
Today I’m having a rough day. And to be honest, that’s the case more of the time than not. These past 20 months have been the hardest of my life – harder than I ever expected. Perhaps I was naive. Most days I struggle to stay patient with this spirited, spitfire child. I have trouble keeping my cool and often, I fail. Sometimes I wonder if there’s something wrong with me; if I’m missing some quality that’s important and inherent to parenting.
We all know that Waits is the Master Of Cute, but the truth is that he’s also an amazing human being. There isn’t a day that goes by that he doesn’t fill me up to my top with joy and with pride. Those characteristics that make him such a challenging toddler – intensity, focus, persistence, enthusiasm, intellect, curiosity, bravery, perception – those are the very same things which will make him such a dynamic, interesting, and successful man some day. And even now, today, those are the things which make him him, and for that I wouldn’t have it any other way. My god, he’s exquisite.
But also, so. damn. hard.
I keep most of this away from Bonzai Aphrodite. BA is supposed to be a happy, positive place, and besides, it’s not a “parenting” blog. On the other hand, I don’t want to perpetuate an unrealistic expectation. I do NOT have everything figured out, I am NOT centered and serene all the time, and I certainly don’t want you thinking that my shit don’t stink. Dudes, I eat lots of chia and take big shits and they stink, okay? Seriously though, I’ve got my share of problems.
Not that I’m complaining. My point, I guess, is that on the Internet, one can really control one’s own image. Lots of bloggers want very badly (and work very hard) to appear flawless. I don’t want that! I think it’s dangerous and unfair. Because people compare, and I couldn’t stomach the thought of a person comparing themselves to some idealized version of me, only to find that they always come up short. Which they would, because nobody is perfect. Nobody has it all together – certainly not me.
Congratulations to Serenity! You are the lucky winner of the Fair Trade gift bag giveaway! Shoot me an email – info AT bonzaiaphrodite DOT com – and we’ll get this thing going!
And now on to the attitude of gratitude – the bestest way to end a week.
Le Love List:
1. My New iPhone
Maybe it’s because it caught me by surprise, but MAN do I love this little gizmo! Seriously, favorite piece of technology I’ve ever owned. The camera is better quality than our little point-and-shoot!! WHAT?!
2. Level 3 Shred
Jillian kicked my ass this morning, and it was AWESOME. ‘Nuff said.
3. ^^ Those! ^^
Seasonal coconut milks in chocolate peppermint and “nog” flavors. Two words: COFFEE and CHIA. No, it’s not health food. Yes, it is a spectacular treat. Spectacular.
Also! Mini pumpkins painted by mini people, snuggling with my dogs and breathing in warm doggy smell, Waits helping out in the kitchen, garden tomatoes in October and the xgfx pizza that they graced with their goodness, afternoon bike rides and crunching through fallen leaves, phone calls with old friends, cravings for Sabra hummus and the delight of fulfilling them, being Grown Up and doing the “big” life stuff, (life insurance/will/godparents – that sort), listening to Waits and Damian make all the animal noises together while I write this right now . . .
Alright guys, now it’s your turn – tell me what you’re loving this week!
My darlings, this happy little post will stay at the top of the page
all weekend until tomorrow because it’s MoFo time y’all, and I’m still POSTING EVERY DAY! However . . . stop by any time to leave your Love List, ask a question, or offer some feedback! Or if you’re new, please introduce yourself and say ‘Oi!’! This is your community, so get involved!
Have a wonderful weekend my friends!