. . . continued from Part I . . .
So I’m sure you’ve figured out that there’s more to diapering than just diapers! For example, you’ll need a surface to ‘take care of the business’, you’ll need space to store the supplies, you’ll definitely need a spot to stack diapers, and of course you’ll need to dump the dirty ones. But don’t get overwhelmed, and don’t go thinking you need a ton of stuff.
Early into our procreation planning we realized a nursery just wasn’t for us. A nursery is meant to harbor *stuff*, which we’re not really into. We knew we would use a co-sleeper, so it only made sense to share the rest of our bedroom as well. Our low-impact parenting philosophy made this a lot easier, as we would not be purchasing roughly 90% of standard new-baby paraphernalia (like, you know, a crib). But there was no denying that we would need a changing area.
Our solution was simple: we relocated a lamp and then outfitted my tallboy dresser with a changing pad (this organic non-toxic one). We added a shelf for the associated accoutrements, with a click-touch led light on the underside for nighttime changes (this was Daman’s idea and it came in so handy! highly recommend!) A bit of rearranging and Waits got 2 small drawers for clothing and one giant drawer for diapers. The decorative hook holds the bag of clean cotton wipes, and the old dog food bin made an excellent diaper pail. Voila! A first rate changing station, DIY style.
Along with cloth diapers we use cotton baby wipes. I made them out of old tee shirts, and they work *great*. I recommend using light colors to you can see what you’re wiping up. In the orange spray bottle is plain water with a few drops of tea tree oil. I spray the wipe to get it good and moist before putting it to use. You can just use plain water as well, or a bit of castile, or other essential oils. The point is that you don’t need to buy any fancy formulated wipes, especially not disposable ones! We also use tea tree oil, an antibacterial and antifungal, to keep the diaper pail fresh.
My diaper collection currently hovers around 25, give or take a few as he grows/I shop. When Waits was a newborn we were washing diapers every other day and could barely keep up, but now at 4 months he goes a lot less and we launder every three days without worry. I use my own laundry detergent recipe and it’s a great non-toxic cleanser, strong enough to sterilize but naturally gentle on delicate skin. I usually throw some Biokleen in there too, but that’s more for stains than for sanitation. I also hear great things about Charlie’s Soap, and a Bonzai reader recommended Rockin’ Green Soap, but I haven’t tried either of these.
But washing can only do so much when you’re dealing with caca on white cloth. If you really want to whiten, there’s nothing more powerful (or more eco-friendly) than that big ol’ bleacher in the sky. That’s right, the sun. And bonus – it naturally kills germs, too! An afternoon on the clothes line does wonders for my precious pads. Check it :
‘Before’ – fresh out of the washing machine . . .
‘After’ – A few hours hangin’ in the summer sun!
Not bad, right?!
So that’s the extent of our diapering drill – that’s all there is to it. But someday (soon! Oh EEK it goes by so fast!) Waits will start on solids, and that’s a whole new potty ballpark. Breastfed baby poo is all soft and friendly, almost sweet smelling and essentially liquid. But real food makes for real poops. And when that time comes, I expect we’ll set up a DIY diaper sprayer, a hack similar to this one. Don’t worry, I’ll be sure to blog about it!
I hope you’ve found it helpful to see the choices we’ve made in our little green family. Of course, everyone does it a bit differently. There’s not a ‘right’ way or a ‘wrong’ way! What I’d love for you to take away from this, is that cloth diapering is totally doable, even – dare I say – a pleasure! You don’t need any fancy bells or whistles. You don’t need any special set-ups or expensive cleansers. As with everything I advocate, a little imagination and a little metaphorical elbow grease will go a long way. It’s just like I always say: Be creative, and have fun with it!
“To cloth or not to cloth?”, that is . . . a different question. An important one, yes, and one that we’ll cover soon in this series. But today, the focus is on cloth. Because that’s how I roll.
To be clear, this is an opinion piece. If you want me to tell you which brands of diapers to buy and which materials are best and what sort of system makes the most sense, well, I can’t! I can’t do that because if there’s one thing I’ve learned on this crazy cloth diapering carousel, it’s this: every baby is different, every bum is different, and different bodies make for different diaper experiences.
For example, I know this sweet new vegan named Sula. Just a few months older than Waits, we met her parents by sharing a table at our favorite, particularly crowded, Sunday brunch buffet. Months later we ran into them again and discovered that we were both pregnant! And now when we bump into each other at brunch we talk babies, as new parents tend to do . . . and of course we also talk cloth, as crunchy folk tend to do.
Sula’s parents swear by the gDiaper system. LOVE THEM. They’re all she wears, with their cloth insert for home or the flushable option for going out, they say it’s the perfect diaper. Which is lucky for them, since gDiapers are one of the less expensive brands. I wish I could love them too – but I don’t.
I have one lovely lipstick red gDiaper and I every time Waits wears it, I end up getting peed on. It leaks. Every. Single. Time. And it’s not just him – I hear this complaint a lot from [ex] g-users. You either love ‘em, or they’re worthless. It totally depends on the shape of your baby.
This anecdote is meant to illustrate why I couldn’t just tell you which brand is ‘the best’. And, why I caution against investing in an entire single-brand system before your baby is even born. If I’d bought only gDiapers, I’d be screwed!
So here’s what I CAN tell you, and if you read this site I’m sure it will come as no surprise. When it comes to cloth diapers: 1) organic is better, and 2) shop secondhand. Here’s what I did . . .
I had *no* idea what I was doing when I jumped into the grand cloth-diapering game. All I knew was that cloth was in line with my values, so cloth it had to be. I imagined the diapers I wore as a baby, bulky fabric held in place with pokey pins, but we’ve come a long way since then. From prefolds to pocket diapers, all-in-ones to ‘longies’, there is an entire world of technology beyond the relics of our own infancy.
Someday Waits will inform me of his own gender identity. But for now, I have no qualms about putting my little boy in hot pink hand-me-down diapers. These are from Bonzai reader Eden – thanks again lady!
So I read the reviews, settled on pockets and covers, found a few highly-rated brands, and then I began my search. I’d hit the used baby store, which became one of my favorite haunts while I was pregnant. The good diapers disappear fast, so check back often! Craigslist is another excellent resource for secondhand diapers. Etsy is amazing if you want ‘new but ethical’, just be warned – it’s easy to lose control over there in the face of all that cute. You could do some serious financial damage!
Over the course of my pregnancy I amassed a modest collection of various brands, from bumGenius (my faves, but expensive) to Fuzzi Bunz (widely available, but S-M-L means you need more of them) to Swaddlebees (so awesome, organic and soft, but also come S-M-L) to Blue Penguin (really not my favorite), to the gDiaper and more. Some were pocket diapers (the Fuzzi Bunz and the Swaddlebees), some were size-adjustable (the bumGenius), some were all-in-ones (the Blue Penguins), and a few were off brand/homemade fitted diapers with off brand/homemade covers. All said and done I started motherhood with roughly 20 diapers.
The diaper drawer, with: cloth diapers, cotton inserts, emergency back-up unbleached non-toxic disposables.
I suggest starting with 15-25 diapers, depending on how much time you’ll have. You’ll need more eventually, but it’s better to start with a small varied supply. Then you can figure out what works for your baby and stock up on that. However, with only 15 diapers you’ll be doing laundry every day, so if that doesn’t seem realistic for your lifestyle you may want to start with a bigger stash. I should also note that we began with a box of newborn-sized disposables, which we ended up using almost exclusively for the first 2 weeks. Newborns are just so small for all that fabric! It’s a good idea to always have ‘sposies on hand (like for when the laundry slips your mind). We just started using them for overnights too, since Waits sleeps through the night (bless his heart!) and cloth ends up leaking. A lot. And we share a bed, so . . . yeah no.
. . . To Be Continued . . .
Okay, so now you’re pregnant. Congratulations! This is probably the most exciting event of your life . . . and maybe the most overwhelming. You know there’s a ton of stuff you’re supposed to do – and a ton of stuff you’re NOT supposed to do. And, as a mindful member of the world community, you know that this one takes ‘responsibility’ to a whole new level. So, where do you even start?! Oh why didn’t you pay closer attention when your sister/cousin/friend was pregnant? And what was that Yahoo news headline about babies and BPA? Damn, there’s a lot to cover!
But don’t you worry, in this series of essays I’m going to address many of the main issues that arise while making – and managing – a ‘green’ baby. From the truth about cloth diapers, to DIY supplies, to why we made the radical and unexpected decision to actually vaccinate our son (no judgments, no worries). But for now let’s start at the very beginning, with the simple stuff.
That’s right: STUFF
Having a baby is one of the most commercialized, consumption-centered events in existence. From the maternity clothes to the party planning to the safety gear – it’s traditionally a product-driven affair. Don’t believe me? Try Googling ‘newborn checklist’ for a laugh at the lengthy inventory that’s supposedly required to bring a baby into your home. Or just go browse Babies ‘R Us for a real fright. Eek!
So in case you haven’t realized it yet (and I certainly didn’t at first), being a parent is all about making choices. An endless series of serious choices. Everyone chooses a different path in parenthood, and that’s as it should be. For me, a lifelong nonconformist, I suspected that my biggest divergence from the traditional route would be in my resolute lack of desire to acquire STUFF.
I try to live lightly and that certainly wasn’t changing because of a baby. In fact, it strengthened my resolve to leave the littlest footprint possible. When I thought of living rooms littered with primary-colored plastic play sets, and all manner of pastel paraphernalia, it made my head spin. That is not for me! No, there had to be a way to avoid over-consumption . . .
~~~
The first thing I did was some serious communication, and this is hands down the most important action you can take. Make a list of your criteria, then prioritize. Be prepared to compromise. A shower invitation with a small note that reads, “The parents-to-be would appreciate non-gendered toys and clothes in natural fibers”, is a lot friendlier than one that declares, “The parents-to-be would prefer only second hand items, non-gendered cotton clothing, no plastic or electronic toys, and please keep things exclusively organic”. It may be true, but it’s just not inviting!
For example, my original intention was to have everything secondhand, but after a few conversations I realized that this was unrealistic. I just couldn’t expect my Granny to go digging through bargain bins down at the thrift. And that’s okay. I was willing to compromise here, with the understanding that not everybody shares – or even really understands – my lifestyle. There were other areas where I was less flexible (***)
There’s many ways to subtly communicate your wishes. Enlist those who know you best to help spread the word (I’m thinking bffs, moms, and mother-in-laws here) It’s really easy to drop a hint in general conversation – “Oh man, I saw the cutest organic onesie from Company X. I think their entire line is organic . . . wouldn’t it be great if all the baby’s clothes were organic? So much better for their precious little skin, ya know?” And there you have it: message sent!
The bottom line is, if it’s important to you (and I’m guessing it is), you’re going to have to communicate.
*** Just an aside for vegans, you may need to gently remind folks of unsuitable items. This includes fibers like wool (very common in baby clothes and people think us crunchy types are all about it), toys which may include bits of fur, feathers, and leather, care products which commonly include beeswax and lanolin, and books or toys expressing animal exploitation, ie farm stuff. A lot of loved ones forget that veganism extends beyond diet.
My awesome mother-in-law made sleepers out of my father-in-law’s old tee shirts!
So once you’ve been clear on what you *don’t* want, it’s time to focus on what you DO want – and that’s the fun part! (for everyone) As noted above, you can find hundreds of ‘new baby needs’ lists all over the Net. Yes, I looked at these. I used them as a rough guide and made my OWN list, which was about 1/3 as long. Making a list is important. It means that when people ask what you want/need, you’ll be able to give them a specific answer. If you don’t, you’ll just end up with tons of clothes. And believe me, you’re already going to get plenty of clothes. They’re just too cute! People can’t resist them! (myself included)
So know what essentials you’ll really need, write it down, and keep track. You don’t want to end up with 3 changing tables and no car seat!
~~~
In this day and age it’s likely your loved ones are spread all over the world, so it’s a good idea to register, and it’s key to register *online*. This gives you a lot more creative control, and yet another way to indirectly express your wishes. If everything you pick is organic, they’ll get the message even if they don’t use the registry. There are tons of online registries like Babies R Us or Target, but I chose Amazon. There’s a couple different reasons for this (and no, Amazon is not paying me to say this, haha)
1) You can get so many things used! In your Amazon profile, under your picture, is a spot for a quote or caption. In mine I wrote ‘please buy secondhand when possible’! Books, music, toys – your relatives can get lots of secondhand baby stuff and satisfy your eco-leanings.
2) The options on Amazon are astounding, and surprisingly progressive. BPA-free baby bottles? Check! Organic hemp wipes? You got it! You really will be able to meet all your greenest needs here.
3) Amazon is not just baby-centric. You probably already have an Amazon account, maybe even an Amazon wishlist. One of the main reasons I keep a registry/wishlist is to simply keep track of things, so they don’t slip my mind forever. I’ll hear some amazing interview with an author and quickly pop over and add the book to the list before I forget about it. Or I’ll remember some song I loved as a child, track down the CD, and add it to the registry for when Waits is older (can’t wait!!!) It’s super handy when you’re already juggling 5 million things with breastfeeding brain fog on top of it all.
4) The ‘universal registry’. This is a spectacular feature that allows you to add pretty much anything on the entire internet. That’s how my wishlist is full of Herbivore stuff, and that’s how *your* baby registry could be filled with one-of-a-kind handmade Etsy toys, or whatever else your heart desires. Awesome, awesome feature.
Bonzai reader Jacquelyn sent us these beautiful handmade bibs and burp rags!
So once you’ve whittled down your wants, you’ve expressed your quirky hippie desires to all the baffled elders, and you’ve helped them out by building a badass registry full of eco-friendly options, there’s only one piece of advice left: Be Thankful. You WILL get stuff you don’t want. The vegan WILL get wool, the BPA-paranoid WILL get freaky cheap made-in-China teethers, and team gender-neutral will get TONS of frilly pink dresses. And it’s okay. More than any other event, having a baby is a time of coming together, and people love to share in it. They may not see the world like you do, but they are being generous, and you should be grateful and gracious in return. Because when it comes down to it, they’re just lovin’ on your baby in the way that they know how. And your baby deserves all the lovin’ it can get!
( . . . and nobody says you have to use the item, or even keep it, but that’s for discretion, and a later date)
BONZAI!
